Author Topic: A Misunderstanding  (Read 648 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline oldcoastie6468

  • Conservative Hero
  • ****
  • Posts: 2555
A Misunderstanding
« on: January 31, 2014, 03:18:22 PM »
A male patient is lying in bed in the hospital, wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose, still heavily sedated from a difficult four hour surgical procedure.

A young student nurse appears to give him a partial sponge bath.

'Nurse,' he mumbles, from behind the mask, 'Are my testicles black?'

Embarrassed, the young nurse replies, 'I don't know,Sir. I'm only here to wash your upper body.'

He struggles to ask again, 'Nurse, are my testicles black?'

Concerned that he may elevate his vitals from worry about his testicles, she overcomes her embarrassment and sheepishly pulls back the covers. She raises his gown, holds his penis in one hand and his testicles in the other, lifting and moving them around and around gently.

Then, she takes a close look and says, 'No sir, they aren't and I assure you, there's nothing wrong with them, Sir!!'

The man pulls off his oxygen mask, smiles at her and says very slowly, 'Thank you very much. That was wonderful, but listen very, very closely......

'A r e - m y - t e s t - r e s u l t s -b a c k ?'
U.S. Coast Guard veteran, 1964-1968

Will Rogers never met Barack Obama. He would not like Obama.

I hate liberals. Liberalism is a disease that causes severe brain damage after it tries to suck knowledge and history out of yours.

Offline AlanS

  • Conservative Superhero
  • *****
  • Posts: 7908
  • Proud Infidel
Re: A Misunderstanding
« Reply #1 on: January 31, 2014, 04:26:10 PM »
I could use a dedicated nurse like that.
"Malo periculosam, libertatem quam quietam servitutem."

Thomas Jefferson

Online Pandora

  • Administrator
  • Conservative Superhero
  • *****
  • Posts: 19530
  • I iz also makin a list. U on it pal.
Re: A Misunderstanding
« Reply #2 on: January 31, 2014, 05:57:28 PM »
Gunsmith sounds just like that with the CPAP mask on.   ;D
"Under certain circumstances, profanity provides a relief denied even to prayer." - Mark Twain

"Let us assume for the moment everything you say about me is true. That just makes your problem bigger, doesn't it?"

Offline AlanS

  • Conservative Superhero
  • *****
  • Posts: 7908
  • Proud Infidel
Re: A Misunderstanding
« Reply #3 on: January 31, 2014, 06:38:03 PM »
Gunsmith sounds just like that with the CPAP mask on.   ;D

I'm glad I wasn't drinking a beverage at the moment I read that. ::laughonfloor::

"Malo periculosam, libertatem quam quietam servitutem."

Thomas Jefferson