Topic: Do You Hate Twilight? Wow, I Really Hate Twilight.

[trapeze]

First of all I really hate "emo boys." They make me want to puke. I could not possibly care less about their deep romantic thoughts and their meaningful looks and crap like that. Slap some fangs on them and make them into soulful vampires and the eyes roll back in my skull as a major league migraine headache starts to split my skull in two.

Does anyone remember "Barney" the obnoxious dinosaur? That's the kind of hatred I'm talking about. There were whole websites dedicated to hating the purple menace. There were sites where you could choose from various weapons (like shotguns and flamethrowers) to decimate him and then you could print out a picture of whatever was left...like say, a pair of smoking stumps where his hind legs used to attach to his body.

Traditional vampires are evil. They suck your blood and steal your soul, dooming you to being undead until someone comes along and drives a stake through your heart, cuts off your head and stuffs your mouth full of garlic. Old school, baby. Not a damned romantic thing about it. I saw "Priest" the other night on cable. Those are vampires. No sparkles. No marrying them and having sex and babies with them.

I would rather watch a Harry Potter film than a Twilight suckfest of vampire "romance."

I hate the Twilight film franchise so much that I am creating this thread just to vent. Sure, there are other places out there that have already done this. Sue me.

Found on the web:

LINK

LINK

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LINK

I am sure I will be back to add to this. If you want to help then go for it.

[Libertas]

Heh, pretty good Trap.  Vampires are evil murderous inhuman creatures, I only want to see flicks where they are slaughtered wholesale, anything else is a bunch of metrosexual garbage.

[IronDioPriest]

I won't waste my money on sparking vampires with teen angst.

Ever see "30 Days of Night"?

Now those were vampires. Dang cool movie too. The premise is so cool, I don't know why nobody ever thought of it before that movie.

The town of Barrow Alaska goes dark for 30 days every year, and all but essential personnel and hardcore Alaskans go South for the month. Guess what that means? 30 days of night, is what that means.

The sheriff and a bunch of townies fall prey to a large pack of vampires with Slavic sounding language. Not sure what language it is, or if it is even a real language, but they are subtitled throughout. The premise is obviously that they came to Northern Alaska across the Bering Strait to feed for the long winter's night.

Nasty, bad, evil vampires.

Re; "Priest" - I loved that movie, but those aren't classic vampires. They're cool monsters, for sure, and they call them vampires, but it is definitely a rewrite of vampire lore.

[Weisshaupt]

MichelleO and her girlfriends are fans. I have been forced to watch these ( except the last...I think.  Really my mind just blots them out)
Stupid Sparkly vampires with passionate forehead kissing.  However, MichelleO is fond of pointing out the Pro-Life message... even if your baby is a dangerous half-breed vampire that might kill you in childbirth, you should have the baby.

[trapeze]

The movie franchise should have been aborted. Sadly it wasn't stillborn.

Now we have to deal with the mess.

[Alphabet Soup]

Someone turned my daughter on to the original Twilight book and she loved it. I remember how psyched she was when the movie was coming and how anxious she was to see it.

...and then how disappointed she was when she finally did see it.

[Glock32]

I'm not into any vein of horror film really, but the opening sequence of the Dracula movie that came out in 1992 is badass. It shows the Count, prior to becoming a vampire, on the field of battle laying waste to Muslim invaders....with his infamous methods.

This is how Muslims should be dealt with.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gns76KB0sEI

[Libertas]

Yeah, fewer show up on your doorstep with bad intentions after you skewer thousands of 'em.   

[LadyVirginia]

Count me among the haters.

I have a 65 year old friend who LOVES those movies.  Ugh.

I saw Love at First Bite with George Hamilton and Susan Saint James in 1979 (not of my own free will).  Charming vampire pursues girl.  DIDN'T care for the idea of a fun-loving vampire. 

I find the romanticizing of evil (vampire)...odd...yet a sign of the times we live in.

[trapeze]

Here is a link to an article titled, "Why Guys Hate Twilight."

Twilight is everything that vampire movies are not supposed to be. They're not to meant to be emotional and loving, but rather frightening and brutal. The Twilight vampires are quite simply the gayest looking vampires I have ever had the misfortune to look upon. A high school setting where the pale weirdo has a reasonably hot girl hanging all over him is slightly infuriating. It was hard enough for the rest to get dates in high school, why should the creepy pale kid who probably smells a little like a funeral home get any ass? That's our ass, dammit! Not to mention this "kid" is over 100 years old! You'd think he'd realize that high school never changes, and stop going by now.

Despite the fact that these vampires are anatomically incorrect with the rest of vampire legend (they twinkle in the sunlight and have no fangs to speak of), the fact remains that these vampires just look and sound like someone we all used to beat up in school, and that just rubs us the wrong way.

Add in that in place of really good vampire violence where the victim is ripped to bloody shreds while the undead feast upon his blood, we have a sparkly, pale, moody vampire staring at a vacant, also pale human girl. Moody stare-fests are only dreamed up by less-than-attractive high school girls while they sit in their room doodling in their diaries instead of going out and interacting with sane society. And thus, vampirism was ruined by the monstrosity that is the Twilight series.

[LadyVirginia]

hahahahaha

funny article

[trapeze]

[Predator Don]

That is too funny.....

[trapeze]

And if "Twilight" isn't bad enough (and it is), Stephenie Meyer is determined to destroy another horror movie staple: "Invasion Of The Body Snatchers."

Yes, because totally screwing over the vampire genre just wasn't enough (apparently) we will soon be treated to yet another bland and vapid story, "The Host."

The Host Official Teaser Trailer #1 - Stephenie Meyer Movie (2013) HD

In "The Host" the whole of planet earth gets invaded by some kind of stupid mind controlling alien micro organism which basically turns everyone into space pussies. Yep, total wimps. (Think about an entire planet of Edward Cullens and Bella Swans. Sorry for that visual...hope you didn't throw up.)

Except not everyone gets possessed. Hmm...where have I heard this story before? But I guess it isn't outright plagiarism because there aren't any pods. Or suspense. Or horror. Nope. Well, anyway...in a normal story like this (say, like "I Am Legend") the remaining humans who aren't possessed by the alien invaders go around lopping the heads off of dopey former humans...some of them get caught and taken over...and there is just a lot of wholesale violence and bloodshed. Yay, everyone wins. Except that doesn't happen in this story. No. In "The Host" there is (you guessed it) some romance between a possessed girl and a still human boy. And they all live happily and peacefully ever after* until the sequel...where they probably have a mutant baby or something.

Stephenie Meyer is the Barack Obama of horror stories...she will not stop until she has completely destroyed the entire horror genre.

EDIT: Did you watch the trailer? Did you notice how the possessed people kind of resemble the Stephenie Meyer bots who buy her books and go to her movies? Funny coincidence, eh?

*Yeah, I know...you think I'm making this crap up. I'm not.

[LadyVirginia]

from trap's link:

In an interview with Vogue Magazine, Meyer stated that body image was a major aspect of her novel. She noted that she is "very critical" of her body, but not others'. In The Host, she tried to convey "what a gift it is to just have a body, and really love it." This is something most humans would take for granted before being captured, and something that Melanie is all-too aware of once she loses control of her body.[6] Other themes Meyer explored were the mother/child bond, the need to change our lives for the ones we love or because our community expects something different of us than what we want, and not fitting in.[7] In other interviews, various themes were noted including the value of the soul and faith in a world that has been destroyed,[5] tolerance, forgiveness, and understanding.[8]

The Host was named one of the "Best Books of May" by Amazon.com

really?

[Weisshaupt]

The Host was named one of the "Best Books of May" by Amazon.com

really?

[/quote]

Is it a surprise that soft porn written for women sells? All Meyer is doing it translating that from the typical setting (seems to be westerns and rural south )  and introducing it to other settings - I am not so sure this will "destroy" a genre. But a new classification needs to be in order Womens' Horron/SciFi/Fantasy Porn as it were. And why do we need this?  Meyer seems to have figured out that women are turned on my romantic tension, and not the act of release.. hence she needs a story arc not just of forbidden love, but one where the act would be dangerous, creepy, and probably end the woman's life as she knows it.  (How Romantic!!) This allows here to preserve the "passionate forehead kissing" stage of a relationship, not for a page, or a chapter, or even for the majority of of book - but for SEVERAL BOOKS - which is why nothing seems to ever happen in the Twilight Movies.  However, you need a "decision" between at least two men to add further tension. Vampire. Werewolf. The geeky kid who asks Bella to the movies ( I was on his "Team".  )  IN the Host, you can bet at some point the alien becomes "human" or leaves the host, and the poor woman then has to decide which part of the original she really loved - the human or the alien....

Sigh.

Anyway, if you can write,  then there is good and easy money to be made following this script. As easy as taking dirty pictures of women and putting them into a magazine ( I read playboy for the articles.)


Update: MichelleO informs me that England and Scotland's landed gentry are also still very popular themes.  Yes, that's right Feminists,  Jane Austen was one of the first great female writers, and what she chose to write was.... women's porn.

[Weisshaupt]

Vampires don't get erections.. they are always stiffs
 

[John Florida]

I won't waste my money on sparking vampires with teen angst.

Ever see "30 Days of Night"?

Now those were vampires. Dang cool movie too. The premise is so cool, I don't know why nobody ever thought of it before that movie.

The town of Barrow Alaska goes dark for 30 days every year, and all but essential personnel and hardcore Alaskans go South for the month. Guess what that means? 30 days of night, is what that means.

The sheriff and a bunch of townies fall prey to a large pack of vampires with Slavic sounding language. Not sure what language it is, or if it is even a real language, but they are subtitled throughout. The premise is obviously that they came to Northern Alaska across the Bering Strait to feed for the long winter's night.

Nasty, bad, evil vampires.

Re; "Priest" - I loved that movie, but those aren't classic vampires. They're cool monsters, for sure, and they call them vampires, but it is definitely a rewrite of vampire lore.

 I did and liked itbut those were real Vamps not these Metrosexual Vamps.And no I watched a couple of minutes and never went back.

[trapeze]

[Pandora]

I have "Zathura" on as background and she's the big sister.