Author Topic: Another example of why standardized tests are a joke  (Read 5307 times)

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Offline LadyVirginia

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Another example of why standardized tests are a joke
« on: April 20, 2012, 02:49:34 PM »
Talking pineapple question on state exam stumps ... everyone! 
 
Students, teachers, principals - no one has any idea what the deal is



Never mind the kids aren't learning anything in school.

Quote
In the story [for the question on the test], a take-off on Aesop’s fable about the tortoise and the hare, a talking pineapple challenges a hare to a race. The other animals wager on the immobile pineapple winning — and ponder whether it’s tricking them.
 
When the pineapple fails to move and the rabbit wins, the animals dine on the pineapple.
 
Students were asked two perplexing questions: why did the animals eat the talking fruit, and which animal was wisest?
 
Teachers, principals and parents contacted by The News said they weren’t sure what the answers were.
 
“My reaction is horror that a question that’s so obviously confusing should be used on a test that is going to be used to determine our kid’s future and the future of our children’s schools,” said parent Leonie Haimson, of Class Size Matters, who first posted the question on her blog.
 
In response to revelations that the state exams had become predictable and easier to pass, the state last year awarded a new $32 million contract to testing company Pearson to overhaul the tests.
 
The new exams have higher stakes for principals and teachers statewide, whose evaluations will be based in part on student scores beginning as soon as this year.
 Scarsdale Middle School Principal Michael McDermott said the question has been used before and “confused students in six or seven different states.”
 
And he had a quick answer to the question of who is the wisest: “Pearson for getting paid $32 million for recycling this crap.”



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Online Pandora

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Re: Another example of why standardized tests are a joke
« Reply #1 on: April 20, 2012, 03:21:08 PM »
WTF?  A talking pineapple?  What the hell was the point?

Ya know, now that I'm an adult, I know "they" are full of crap.  This has got to make kids think they're the crazy or stupid ones.
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Offline LadyVirginia

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Re: Another example of why standardized tests are a joke
« Reply #2 on: April 20, 2012, 03:36:27 PM »
What the hell was the point?


There is no point--that's the big game in education.  I recently read a book about how standardized tests aren't designed to test what kids know.  They're designed to have certain outcomes.  If too many kids get questions right the tests are redesigned so fewer students do well.  If too many don't do well they redesign it.  You might think that a test where most kids did well would be lauded.  But no it's considered a bad test.

Millions are spent on this crap.  All the time wasted and it doesn't really mean anything.

As a homeschooler I've been asked dozens of times "...but what about standerdized testing.  How do you how your child is doing?"  I usually say well since I'm right there with them everyday I know what they are doing and how well.  But as the book I referenced said, parents and teachers who think these tests truly measure their kids are seriously uninformed.
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Online Pandora

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Re: Another example of why standardized tests are a joke
« Reply #3 on: April 20, 2012, 03:39:39 PM »
So, the point is to make work for the test-designers.

*sigh*

"Under certain circumstances, profanity provides a relief denied even to prayer." - Mark Twain

"Let us assume for the moment everything you say about me is true. That just makes your problem bigger, doesn't it?"

Offline LadyVirginia

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Re: Another example of why standardized tests are a joke
« Reply #4 on: April 20, 2012, 03:52:58 PM »
So, the point is to make work for the test-designers.

*sigh*



sort of like how carbon credits will solve global warming
standardized tests will help schools and students

I bet we here at IAL could come up with a better test and it wouldn't cost us $32 million.  Of course, I'd ask things like who is George Washington, identify the Bill of Rights, what was the Civil War?  ::laughonfloor::

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Online Pandora

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Re: Another example of why standardized tests are a joke
« Reply #5 on: April 20, 2012, 03:58:47 PM »
So, the point is to make work for the test-designers.

*sigh*



sort of like how carbon credits will solve global warming
standardized tests will help schools and students

I bet we here at IAL could come up with a better test and it wouldn't cost us $32 million.  Of course, I'd ask things like who is George Washington, identify the Bill of Rights, what was the Civil War?  ::laughonfloor::



Yeah, and most kids not homeschooled would fail miserably.  BAD TEST-MAKER!  NO BISCUIT!
"Under certain circumstances, profanity provides a relief denied even to prayer." - Mark Twain

"Let us assume for the moment everything you say about me is true. That just makes your problem bigger, doesn't it?"

Offline AlanS

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Re: Another example of why standardized tests are a joke
« Reply #6 on: April 20, 2012, 07:07:40 PM »
Students were asked two perplexing questions: why did the animals eat the talking fruit, and which animal was wisest?
 
Teachers, principals and parents contacted by The News said they weren’t sure what the answers were.

Did the story happen to be written by Timothy Leary?
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Offline Sectionhand

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Re: Another example of why standardized tests are a joke
« Reply #7 on: April 21, 2012, 04:16:24 AM »
The answers should have been easy and would have really flummoxed the test givers ...

1. The animals ate the talking fruit because it was a government hand-out .

2. The wisest animal was the one which wanted to eat the rabbit and keep the talking fruit for a reality T.V. show . After all , how many talking pineapples are there anyway ? Besides , we already have a talking a$$hole in the White House !
« Last Edit: April 21, 2012, 04:20:03 AM by Sectionhand »

Offline warpmine

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Re: Another example of why standardized tests are a joke
« Reply #8 on: April 21, 2012, 10:20:44 PM »
The answers should have been easy and would have really flummoxed the test givers ...

1. The animals ate the talking fruit because it was a government hand-out .

2. The wisest animal was the one which wanted to eat the rabbit and keep the talking fruit for a reality T.V. show . After all , how many talking pineapples are there anyway ? Besides , we already have a talking a$$hole in the White House !
::rolllaughing::
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Online Libertas

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Re: Another example of why standardized tests are a joke
« Reply #9 on: April 22, 2012, 02:11:31 PM »
Heh!  Double-chuckles for Alan & SH!

 ::hysterical::   ::hysterical::
We are now where The Founders were when they faced despotism.

Offline BMG

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Re: Another example of why standardized tests are a joke
« Reply #10 on: May 13, 2012, 08:06:31 PM »
LINK

Quote
Seriously now, how hard is to write questions for third-graders that don’t (a) address creepy topics like cannibalism, (b) ask how many slaves it would take to pick an orchard clean, or (c) intrude on their and their family’s privacy by asking them to write about a secret they had trouble keeping? The answer obviously is (d) very.

Quote
The website NJ.com reports that one parent, Richard Goldberg of Marlboro, was appalled when he asked his 9-year-old twin sons about the exam and was told about the question, which required an essay. One of the boys wrote about breaking a ceiling fan and not telling his dad (presumably until now). The other wrote about the time Goldberg took them out of school on false pretenses for a day of skiing!

“All of a sudden,” Goldberg told reporters, “you have in a sense Big Brother checking out the secrets of families.” He added that the question has the potential to open up all manner of Pandora’s boxes. He asked, as a hypothetical, what action administrators might feel impelled to take it the secret divulged had to do with a criminal act.

Is this just a step toward desensitizing the public to such things so that in future, the government can glean such 'secrets' about one's political philosophies and maybe make arrests based on one's political leanings?

And what happens if say, a student just makes something up that they may think is funny or clever...maybe after having just played some violent video game or watched some violent TV show for example? Is the next step for the school system to start playing the part of law enforcement (even more than they do already!) and send some of their 'agents' armed with 12GA shotguns to kick in some doors in the middle of the night? How far does this go...when does it go too far?

It has already gone too far! The school system IS NOT a law enforcement agency and this is a step in that direction.

 ::cussing::
« Last Edit: May 13, 2012, 08:10:36 PM by BMG »
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Offline EW1(SG)

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Re: Another example of why standardized tests are a joke
« Reply #11 on: May 13, 2012, 09:03:18 PM »
That one is easy:  a) the animals ate the pineapple because they have all become Democrats and converted to vegans; and b) the azalea.
My doctor told me to start killing people.  Not in those exact words, she said I had to reduce the stress in my life.

Same thing.

Offline LadyVirginia

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Re: Another example of why standardized tests are a joke
« Reply #12 on: May 13, 2012, 10:18:53 PM »
"They" have always looked for ways to snoop into children's home life.

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Offline EW1(SG)

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Re: Another example of why standardized tests are a joke
« Reply #13 on: May 13, 2012, 10:38:24 PM »
LINK

Quote
Seriously now, how hard is to write questions for third-graders that don’t (a) address creepy topics like cannibalism, (b) ask how many slaves it would take to pick an orchard clean, or (c) intrude on their and their family’s privacy by asking them to write about a secret they had trouble keeping? The answer obviously is (d) very.

Quote
The website NJ.com reports that one parent, Richard Goldberg of Marlboro, was appalled when he asked his 9-year-old twin sons about the exam and was told about the question, which required an essay. One of the boys wrote about breaking a ceiling fan and not telling his dad (presumably until now). The other wrote about the time Goldberg took them out of school on false pretenses for a day of skiing!

“All of a sudden,” Goldberg told reporters, “you have in a sense Big Brother checking out the secrets of families.” He added that the question has the potential to open up all manner of Pandora’s boxes. He asked, as a hypothetical, what action administrators might feel impelled to take it the secret divulged had to do with a criminal act.

Is this just a step toward desensitizing the public to such things so that in future, the government can glean such 'secrets' about one's political philosophies and maybe make arrests based on one's political leanings?

And what happens if say, a student just makes something up that they may think is funny or clever...maybe after having just played some violent video game or watched some violent TV show for example? Is the next step for the school system to start playing the part of law enforcement (even more than they do already!) and send some of their 'agents' armed with 12GA shotguns to kick in some doors in the middle of the night? How far does this go...when does it go too far?

It has already gone too far! The school system IS NOT a law enforcement agency and this is a step in that direction.

 ::cussing::

You are aware that the DOE (as in "Education," not "Energy") has ARMED agents?

I mean, seriously WTF?  What could the Department of Education POSSIBLY require armed agents for?

ETA:  DoE buying 27 shotguns

Wouldn't it make more sense to just call the FBI if you needed muscle?
My doctor told me to start killing people.  Not in those exact words, she said I had to reduce the stress in my life.

Same thing.

Offline Alphabet Soup

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Re: Another example of why standardized tests are a joke
« Reply #14 on: May 13, 2012, 11:49:19 PM »
Speaking of telling secrets and Mother's day...

Us kids were into our teens and most of us were in high school. The state fair here in Washington state typically runs the first week of September. Guess what else starts the first week of September?

So my mom gets a call from the dean of students. He coyly asks if (my next older brother) is home and she replies, "no". He asks if she knows if he was sick that day? She responds that he wasn't that she knew of. Still playing a game, he asks if she knows where he is right now? She replied, "Well I imagine that he's at the fair". Her candid response completely took the guy by surprise and he sputtered for a bit before he launched into a scold - at my mom.

She let him go on for a while and then, when he stopped to take a break she interjected, "Look Mr. whoever you are, you know as well as I do that most of the kids skip school to go to the fair. Now you can dance around and pretend it isn't so, or play your foolish "gotcha" games or you can treat people with respect. He'll be back to school tomorrow and will accept whatever punishment is reasonable so why don't you just relax."

I wouldn't have believed it if I hadn't been sitting there listening.

God bless ya Mom, and Happy Mother's Day to ya!  ;)

Edit: altard-proofed

Offline LadyVirginia

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Re: Another example of why standardized tests are a joke
« Reply #15 on: May 14, 2012, 08:45:55 AM »
Aewsome mom!

AS, that was back in the day when parents were responsible for their own children.

NOW parents completely wrap their lives around whatever the school requires.  The schools are supposed to be there for us not the other way around.
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Offline BMG

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Re: Another example of why standardized tests are a joke
« Reply #16 on: May 14, 2012, 05:42:04 PM »
Quote
Is the next step for the school system to start playing the part of law enforcement (even more than they do already!) and send some of their 'agents' armed with 12GA shotguns to kick in some doors in the middle of the night? How far does this go...when does it go too far?

You are aware that the DOE (as in "Education," not "Energy") has ARMED agents?

Yup, I sure am aware of it...


“The Constitution is not an instrument for the government to restrain the people, it is an instrument for the people to restrain the government.” 
- Patrick Henry

"The more corrupt the state, the more it legislates."
- Tacitus

Offline Glock32

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Re: Another example of why standardized tests are a joke
« Reply #17 on: May 14, 2012, 07:12:21 PM »
Aewsome mom!

AS, that was back in the day when parents were responsible for their own children.

NOW parents completely wrap their lives around whatever the school requires.  The schools are supposed to be there for us not the other way around.

More and more I am convinced that America's problems are that it is no longer a frontier society. The frontier selects in favor of individual initiative and self-reliance. When we were a frontier society, our predecessors were able to leave the blissninnies behind in Europe with their precious kings and aristocracies to make all the scary choices for them.

Fast forward and we're beyond the frontier stage. We're now in the incubator stage, living off the work of previous generations even as we condemn our own descendents to unbearable debt and decline.

We're at that awkward phase in the arc of human history where the Earth is too small and the cosmos still too far out of reach.
« Last Edit: May 14, 2012, 07:15:31 PM by Glock32 »
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Re: Another example of why standardized tests are a joke
« Reply #18 on: May 15, 2012, 07:08:49 AM »
Aewsome mom!

AS, that was back in the day when parents were responsible for their own children.

NOW parents completely wrap their lives around whatever the school requires.  The schools are supposed to be there for us not the other way around.

More and more I am convinced that America's problems are that it is no longer a frontier society. The frontier selects in favor of individual initiative and self-reliance. When we were a frontier society, our predecessors were able to leave the blissninnies behind in Europe with their precious kings and aristocracies to make all the scary choices for them.

Fast forward and we're beyond the frontier stage. We're now in the incubator stage, living off the work of previous generations even as we condemn our own descendents to unbearable debt and decline.

We're at that awkward phase in the arc of human history where the Earth is too small and the cosmos still too far out of reach.

 ::hanging::
We are now where The Founders were when they faced despotism.

Offline LadyVirginia

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Re: Another example of why standardized tests are a joke
« Reply #19 on: May 15, 2012, 08:43:10 AM »

More and more I am convinced that America's problems are that it is no longer a frontier society.

I think you're right.
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