Author Topic: The "I Saw This Funny Thing On The Net" Thread  (Read 600529 times)

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Offline Libertas

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Re: The "I Saw This Funny Thing On The Net" Thread
« Reply #960 on: September 07, 2014, 04:25:22 PM »
So far no fatalities during zombie pub crawls either...

I think I am disappointed a little bit...   ;D
We are now where The Founders were when they faced despotism.

Offline trapeze

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Re: The "I Saw This Funny Thing On The Net" Thread
« Reply #961 on: September 08, 2014, 12:46:08 AM »
Well trained dog. Barking would have ruined the effect.
In a doomsday scenario, hippies will be among the first casualties. So not everything about doomsday will be bad.

Online ToddF

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Re: The "I Saw This Funny Thing On The Net" Thread
« Reply #962 on: September 08, 2014, 08:15:52 AM »
A CNN Reporter, BBC Reporter, and an Israeli commando were captured by terrorists in Iraq. The leader of the terrorists told them that he would grant them each one last request before they were beheaded.
The CNN Reporter said, ‘Well, I’m an American, so I’d like one last hamburger with French fries.” The leader nodded to an underling who left and returned with the burger & fries. The reporter ate it and said “Now, I can die.”
The BBC Reporter said, ‘I’m a reporter to the end. I want to take out my tape recorder and describe the scene here and what’s about to happen. Maybe someday someone will hear it and know that I was on the job till the end.” The terror leader directed an aide to hand over the tape recorder and dictated some comments. The reporter then said, ‘Now I can die knowing I stayed true until the end.”
The leader turned and said, “And now, Mr. Israeli tough guy, what is your final wish?”
“Kick me in the ass,” said the soldier.
“What?’ asked the leader, “Will you mock us in your last hour?”
“No, I’m not kidding. I want you to kick me in the ass,” insisted the Israeli. So the leader shoved him into the open and kicked him in the ass.
The soldier went sprawling, but rolled to his knees, pulled a 9 mm pistol from under his flak jacket, and shot the leader dead. In the resulting confusion, he jumped to his knapsack, pulled out his carbine and sprayed the terrorists with gunfire. In a flash, all terrorists were either dead or fleeing for their lives.
As the soldier was untying the reporters, they asked him, “Why didn’t you just shoot them in the beginning? Why did you ask them to kick you in the ass first?”
“What?” replied the Israeli, “and have you report that I was the aggressor?”

 ::thumbsup::

Offline Libertas

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Re: The "I Saw This Funny Thing On The Net" Thread
« Reply #963 on: September 08, 2014, 11:20:28 AM »
heh.

but the progs would still say the Jew started it.   ::pullhair::

Just shoot!   ::rockets::

We are now where The Founders were when they faced despotism.

Offline AlanS

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Re: The "I Saw This Funny Thing On The Net" Thread
« Reply #964 on: September 08, 2014, 05:22:24 PM »
A CNN Reporter, BBC Reporter, and an Israeli commando were captured by terrorists in Iraq. The leader of the terrorists told them that he would grant them each one last request before they were beheaded.
The CNN Reporter said, ‘Well, I’m an American, so I’d like one last hamburger with French fries.” The leader nodded to an underling who left and returned with the burger & fries. The reporter ate it and said “Now, I can die.”
The BBC Reporter said, ‘I’m a reporter to the end. I want to take out my tape recorder and describe the scene here and what’s about to happen. Maybe someday someone will hear it and know that I was on the job till the end.” The terror leader directed an aide to hand over the tape recorder and dictated some comments. The reporter then said, ‘Now I can die knowing I stayed true until the end.”
The leader turned and said, “And now, Mr. Israeli tough guy, what is your final wish?”
“Kick me in the ass,” said the soldier.
“What?’ asked the leader, “Will you mock us in your last hour?”
“No, I’m not kidding. I want you to kick me in the ass,” insisted the Israeli. So the leader shoved him into the open and kicked him in the ass.
The soldier went sprawling, but rolled to his knees, pulled a 9 mm pistol from under his flak jacket, and shot the leader dead. In the resulting confusion, he jumped to his knapsack, pulled out his carbine and sprayed the terrorists with gunfire. In a flash, all terrorists were either dead or fleeing for their lives.
As the soldier was untying the reporters, they asked him, “Why didn’t you just shoot them in the beginning? Why did you ask them to kick you in the ass first?”
“What?” replied the Israeli, “and have you report that I was the aggressor?”

 ::thumbsup::

That'd be funny if it weren't so true.
"Malo periculosam, libertatem quam quietam servitutem."

Thomas Jefferson

Offline Glock32

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Re: The "I Saw This Funny Thing On The Net" Thread
« Reply #965 on: September 09, 2014, 02:28:33 PM »
"The Fourth Estate is less honorable than the First Profession."

- Yours Truly

Offline Libertas

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Re: The "I Saw This Funny Thing On The Net" Thread
« Reply #966 on: September 10, 2014, 06:44:27 AM »
Heh, guaranteed to send libiot heads a poppin', a bona fide two-fer!   ::bustamove::
We are now where The Founders were when they faced despotism.

Offline AlanS

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Re: The "I Saw This Funny Thing On The Net" Thread
« Reply #967 on: September 14, 2014, 06:42:54 PM »
"Malo periculosam, libertatem quam quietam servitutem."

Thomas Jefferson

Offline Libertas

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Re: The "I Saw This Funny Thing On The Net" Thread
« Reply #968 on: September 15, 2014, 06:31:34 AM »
 ::facepalm::

That's just...it's...I mean really, that is just, so...

 ::unknowncomic::
We are now where The Founders were when they faced despotism.

Offline Glock32

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Re: The "I Saw This Funny Thing On The Net" Thread
« Reply #969 on: September 15, 2014, 07:44:07 AM »
That course has an impressive water hazard.
"The Fourth Estate is less honorable than the First Profession."

- Yours Truly

Offline Glock32

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Re: The "I Saw This Funny Thing On The Net" Thread
« Reply #970 on: September 16, 2014, 11:10:58 PM »
"The Fourth Estate is less honorable than the First Profession."

- Yours Truly

Offline Libertas

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Re: The "I Saw This Funny Thing On The Net" Thread
« Reply #971 on: September 17, 2014, 06:45:59 AM »
Heh!   ::thumbsup::

So stealin' that!
We are now where The Founders were when they faced despotism.

Offline Libertas

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Re: The "I Saw This Funny Thing On The Net" Thread
« Reply #972 on: September 17, 2014, 07:54:12 AM »
PolySciTard study - Conservatives and liberals smell different...

http://theweek.com/speedreads/index/268219/speedreads-study-conservatives-and-liberals-smell-different

Well, duh!  Lefties descend from skanky early 20th century progressives, who went on the spawn FDR progressives, who then spawned a bunch of stinking hippies, who then spawned a new generation of libiots, etc...

Lefties stink!!!  What a newsflash!   ::hysterical::
We are now where The Founders were when they faced despotism.

Offline Libertas

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Re: The "I Saw This Funny Thing On The Net" Thread
« Reply #973 on: September 18, 2014, 11:22:42 AM »
http://www.cnbc.com/id/102009068

10% of Americans go to work stoned...

What they don't tell you -

1)  100% of them are Democrats!

2)  Most of those meeting the "work" standard are employed by government!
We are now where The Founders were when they faced despotism.

Offline John Florida

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Re: The "I Saw This Funny Thing On The Net" Thread
« Reply #974 on: September 18, 2014, 07:13:47 PM »
All men are created equal"
 Filippo Mazzie

Offline Libertas

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Re: The "I Saw This Funny Thing On The Net" Thread
« Reply #975 on: October 02, 2014, 07:33:03 AM »
This is karma!

White Dykes in Ohio suing a Chicago Sperm Bank for screwing up their order for white sperm and instead got black sperm and now she is 5 months pregnant and suing...

http://cleveland.cbslocal.com/2014/10/02/2-white-lesbians-sue-after-becoming-pregnant-with-sperm-donated-by-black-man/

See, now if you bred the way God and nature intended, honey!  Well, if you stay sober that is more likely.

Silly Dyke, breeding is for normals!

I wonder who the donor is?
We are now where The Founders were when they faced despotism.

Offline AlanS

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Re: The "I Saw This Funny Thing On The Net" Thread
« Reply #976 on: October 02, 2014, 08:31:45 AM »
This is karma!

White Dykes in Ohio suing a Chicago Sperm Bank for screwing up their order for white sperm and instead got black sperm and now she is 5 months pregnant and suing...

http://cleveland.cbslocal.com/2014/10/02/2-white-lesbians-sue-after-becoming-pregnant-with-sperm-donated-by-black-man/

See, now if you bred the way God and nature intended, honey!  Well, if you stay sober that is more likely.

Silly Dyke, breeding is for normals!

I wonder who the donor is?




"Malo periculosam, libertatem quam quietam servitutem."

Thomas Jefferson

Offline Libertas

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Re: The "I Saw This Funny Thing On The Net" Thread
« Reply #977 on: October 02, 2014, 11:26:40 AM »
 ::hysterical::   ::rolllaughing::   ::laughonfloor::

I just knew I was going to like a response!!!

 ::thumbsup::
We are now where The Founders were when they faced despotism.

Online ToddF

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Re: The "I Saw This Funny Thing On The Net" Thread
« Reply #978 on: October 03, 2014, 10:39:40 AM »
@WZ

 ::hysterical::

 ::thinking::

 ::bus::

 ::upsidedownflag::

Offline AlanS

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Re: The "I Saw This Funny Thing On The Net" Thread
« Reply #979 on: October 03, 2014, 10:54:24 AM »
Obie Gonnie? ::laughonfloor::
"Malo periculosam, libertatem quam quietam servitutem."

Thomas Jefferson