I was raised in the Catholic Church, from baptism through confirmation. It was a dead faith to me. It was a place for me to learn bible stories and a social club for my parents. The reality of Jesus Christ or the profound reality of his sacrifice, resurrection, and resulting salvation was never impressed upon me in any way to which I could relate or understand.
After confirmation - when my Catholic Catechism was complete, and I was entrusted with my own faith, it was the easiest thing in the world for me to walk away. In my mind, I left absolutely nothing behind but empty rhetoric about a religion based on a God I could not see, feel, touch, or hear.
Then I went to a Young Life Christian camp with a buddy, just for the heck of it, because I thought it would be fun, and there would be chicks. There, I met the living Jesus Christ. I faced my own sinful nature, repented for it, acknowledged the Lordship of Jesus, and asked Him for the forgiveness that I now understood He had already given.
Then, I walked away from Him. For about 24 years, I lived outside of God's will entirely, and put Jesus out of my mind. For that flickering moment at 16 I knew Jesus, but I succumbed to other spiritual forces.
At 40, I had a calling on my heart to come back to Jesus. It was a process, and working through it was a long (short in some ways) discovery. But at some point I was forced to look back at a long period of my life, and have a reckoning. I recommitted my life to Christ, repenting for walking away from the commitment I made when I was 16.
As I came back into relationship with Christ, I realized that from the moment I gave my life to Him at the Young Life camp, He had never, ever abandoned me. He never left me, I left Him, and He stayed nonetheless.
One could point to the foundation I received in the Catholic Church as the basis for what God planted and sewed later. In my heart, I cannot discount this. But I can clearly note a demarcation between two stages in my life, and it is not before I recommitted and after, but rather, before I committed the first time, and after.
The passing of almost a decade since I recommitted my heart to Christ has provided a perspective that lumps everything before 16 into a faithless, Godless existence, and everything after 16 into a life blessed by God, guided by Holy Spirit.
The promises He makes are real. Those promises exist outside of church walls and sectarian doctrine. Based on what I know of His hand in my life, I am as certain of this as a man can be.
I suppose that makes me a heretic. I can deal with that.