Topic: Surprise visit surprises AZ folks off Maui

[Libertas]

http://www.wptv.com/dpp/news/local_news/water_cooler/humpback-whale-bumps-canoe-watch-video-of-close-encounter-with-whale-off-maui-coast

No word yet if they've been sued by EcoTards for marine mammal harassment...

[Pandora]

So, is that humpback for "Howdy!"?

[Libertas]

Humpback for "Hey, let's see what  happens if I do this?"!   

He jus' wanna play!

[AlanS]

Are there plans to sue the whale for them being traumatized?

[Libertas]

Failure to signal intent or respect right of way?  

 

"Pull over Mac, keep those fins up where I can see 'em"!

 

[ToddF]

Did he extend the infamous finger of friendship?

 

[Pandora]

I've never seen a canoe with, er ..... pontoons.  It reminded me of a catamaran.

[Libertas]

Outrigger? Polynesian technology, it would be raaaaacist to attack the design.  

/

[RickZ]

I wrote the following based upon this picture a number of years ago (July, 2010).  But it still works with the story of this thread.



Whale swim-bys have been increasing all across the planet.  "It's organized mayhem," said one skipper who refused to be identified for fear of retaliation.  He went on, "These whales are criminal."  Said another on the subject of reparations for centuries of whaling, "I think that's hogwash.  I don't hunt whales.  Don't blame me for what other people did a long time ago, and even today."  Whale gangs have branched out since they got their start hunting down scrimshaw dealers and harpoonists.  Now it seems the violence is mindless.  Any boat is a potential victim.  It's gotten so bad Lloyd's of London has started offering whale gang insurance not only to the professionals on the high seas, but to the lollygaggers as well.  Said a Lloyd's spokesman, "We've been at the forefront of sea-going insurance for decades.  We saw this whale gang problem so we worked out a way to help make whole those who suffer needlessly from such deliberate acts of destruction."  The UN is considering bringing pressure from the international community to take away whale gangs' sanctuaries.  More severe actions demanded include reducing the krill population in an attempt to starve the whale gangs out of existence.  But not all are on board with the program.  Said Ambassador Obligo from Camaroon, "We Africans think this is a white and asian man's burden, and should not be borne by Africa."  So while the problem is recognized, solutions are slim.  We can expect more boats to be lost as the whale gang violence continues.

~ Pegleg 'Pete' Murcheson covers the Whale Gang beat.  Next Pete will be reporting on the costs to the justice system in bringing these whale gangsters to justice -- including corruption in the holding tank industry.

[Libertas]

Hey, that is some fine writing Rick! 

 

[RickZ]

Hey, that is some fine writing Rick! 

Thanks.  Writing is easy, poetry is hard.


Bullshyt

Bullshyt is the gentle art,
By which one does dash and dart --
On all topics far apart,
Without meaning from the heart.


And my favorite:

A Primer

A brisk chill does evoke fanciful games,
Hidden in January’s keen light.
Many nuances often play quietly, rapidly,
Sluiced through undercurrents--veering wistful,
Examining yesterday’s zeal.

And that, my friend, is your alphabet lesson for today.

As for the Bullshyt poem, that was from a small creative writing class in 1979, I think there were like seven students in the class.  The teacher, a very minor published poet (she had a book that could have been a vanity publication), read the poem twice, as one should, then she started to comment on it.  She said that she would change this or that word and I immediately held up my hands in the football 'timeout' signal, saying, "Whoa, timeout, hold the show."  I then asked her what was the rhyme scheme/meter of that poem.  She reread the poem and I could see the light beginning to dawn.  When she was done the third reading, she said that she wouldn't change a thing.  I said, 'That's what I thought, too."  That was the first moment I realized I knew more than 'educated' college professors (or TAs or an adjunct lecturer) and that it really was time to pack up when it came to higher ed 'schooling'.

[Libertas]

Good stuff!   

For some reason my attempts at poetry end up looking like something thrown together by a literate idiot...

 

[AlanS]

Good stuff!   

For some reason my attempts at poetry end up looking like something thrown together by a literate idiot...

 

You and I must have attended different schools together.

Great work, Rick!!

[RickZ]

For some reason my attempts at poetry end up looking like something thrown together by a literate idiot...

I have more circular file poetry than not.  Like I said, poetry is hard.  Of course, the exception to the 'poetry is hard' rule is the stream of consciousness bullsh*t that a poet like Maya Angelou makes us suffer through (I still remember her droning on reading a poem at one of Clinton's inaugurations).  The good thing about 'real' poetry is structure.  You have to write so the words roll but fit into a predetermined pattern, rhyme scheme, meter, etc.  For example, I've never written a sonnet, or anything near in length to The Rhyme of the Ancient Mariner.

Even though A Primer is short, there is a structure, just not the typical ones.  In this case, I wrote the alphabet (with poetic license for 'x'), so that's pretty much structure (or it was structure when I went to school).  To make it not sound stilted and forced is the key.  Bullshyt took me well over 4 months to write (though I wasn't just working on it, but other classes -- and poetry).  But I have one poem that has some length that I swear I did not write.  Honestly, I felt like someone's fingers were pushing mine down on the electric typewriter (I was trying to emulate Ambrose Bierce's style* and I think he just wanted to help, being dead all those years); the basics of the poem was 'written' in a rush of a day or two.  Then I spent months cleaning and tightening it up.

*  I even wrote a fairly lengthy update of Bierce's The Devil's Dictionary.  One of Bierce's more topical definitions, relevent today, is:

Conservative, n:  A statesman who is enamored of existing evils, as distinguished from the Liberal who wishes to replace them with others.

One of my entries was:

zoo, n:  A safe spot from which animals can view man.

[Libertas]

I took a poetry class a long time ago...I passed, one of the very few classes where I am not sure what I did to deserve that.

Some of what you said tickles a memory node, but just it's just a tickle.   

PS-I like both definitions, pretty good!