Topic: And the Narcissist of the week goes to..

[Weisshaupt]

Amelia Mularz

I decided just to talk to Greg. I told him that I was interested in being with other guys physically. We had talked about marriage and monogamy before and both agreed that it would be tough to sleep with one person for the rest of our lives, so I knew we were on the same page to some extent. But that was a purely hypothetical conversation. This was real and present. After a long talk, he agreed that an open relationship would be worth a try.

Because, you know, otherwise he would loose access to my oh so wonderful privates.  

"About a week later I met a guy through mutual friends, and we hooked up that night. Immediately I felt guilty. It was 6am by the time I got home, and Greg was still asleep. I started thinking about saying those words out loud — I had sex with someone else — and it felt awful. When he finally woke up, he could tell I was upset. I told him I’d slept with another guy. Greg held me. He said I shouldn’t be scared and that he understood."

I understand too. You are a slut. You feel bad because you selfishly used another person for your own gratification, and shared intimacy with a man other than the one you love.  That thing you are feeling is SHAME.  Its a warning to stop that behavior.  Does she listen?  Of course not

"The critical thing in open relationships like the one we had is that you cannot develop emotions for the other people that you meet. It’s a huge no-no. Both Greg and I have been guilty of that one. We each took a step back at those times, re-evaluated, and took some space from those other people to avoid confusion."

The critical thing in an open relationship is treating the others you have sex with as prostitutes or unthinking pieces of meat you masturbate with. The fact that its inhuman and evil to do so sometimes makes you slip and you develop feelings for the other person.  Having feelings for your cheap hookup -That is deeply and morally  wrong!

"It was about a year before Greg slept with another woman. I was okay with it, of course; I had to be because I’d slept with multiple men before him. Eventually we had to adjust our rules because we realized it’s really hard for a guy to hook up with a woman if he can’t bring her back to his place. So I told Greg he could use our apartment as long as he changed the sheets immediately after sex."

Because oddly, the women willing to sleep with Greg didn't want to feel like cheap prostitutes getting banged in alleys and hotel rooms.  But its all good, because Greg would change the sheets so no evidence of the skanky sluts he brought home would be obvious. Wonder if she ever wore the same panties to bed after?

"I admit that in some ways, this is a selfish thing — Greg and I want to sleep with other people. But in a lot of ways, I think it’s pretty selfless, too. We see each other as individuals, and we want to experience things as individuals in order to make our bond as a couple stronger. What we’ve done is take the “rules” out of sexuality and relationship and made those things conform to us. I have so many friends who have experienced infidelity. They always say, "It’s not the sex that bothered me; it’s the lying." Greg and I have totally eliminated the possibility of lying, and we couldn't be happier."

I am so selfless, because we see each other as individuals (and the other people I sleep with as  sex toys ) -each of us is free to selfishly pursue what we want with the "selfless" permission of the other!    Because as long as I don't lie, and tell my boyfriend straight to his face that  he is not enough for me sexually,  he can decide to still hang around with me in other ways.  

"Cameron has never been in love -- at least, nobody's ever been in love with him. If things don't change for him, he's gonna marry the first girl he lays, and she's gonna treat him like sh*t, because she will have given him what he has built up in his mind as the end-all, be-all of human existence. She won't respect him, 'cause you can't respect somebody who kisses your ass. It just doesn't work." -Ferris Bueller

Yeah, I am libertarian and all - And yes, I think if this sort of think "works" for you then sure, you should be allowed to so it ( and others should be allowed to judge you accordingly) However, if this sort of thing does "work" for you,  there is something very, very, wrong with you- in a psychopathic sort of way - not only do you not care about the effects on others outside your "open relationship"  - if you can actually avoid having feelings for someone you repeatedly sleep with, then there is just something very, very wrong with your emotional makeup.

I think if we were to hear Greg's side of the story it would be one of emotional blackmail. Or perhaps not. Maybe he already thinks of his girlfriend as a slut, and therefore is turned on by the idea of her acting like one.  Just pray these two never have kids.
 

[RickZ]

Just pray these two never have kids.

Her uterus ain't for birthin' no babies.  Kills all those one night shack-ups.

[Weisshaupt]

Just pray these two never have kids.

Her uterus ain't for birthin' no babies.  Kills all those one night shack-ups.

Yeah, that is why she will make us pay for the 14 abortions she will have over her lifetime, selflessly allowing her babies to merge back with the cosmos.

[Libertas]

Julianation and Fluking, new terms to describe the descent of society.

[IronDioPriest]

What reason for getting married DOESN'T the Leftist mindset destroy? What definition of the word survives the application of Leftist behavior within the confines of the institution? These two people are married in name only.

People of all ideological persuasions cheat, and all cheaters hurt marriage - so that's not my point. But cheating, and attempting to redefine marriage so that cheating is a feature, are not the same thing. My point is that this particular redefinition of marriage comes from the same "it's all good/gray" liberal immorality as homosexuals who wish to redefine it to comport to their own particular perversion.

Attacking the institution in these ways make the institution itself meaningless. Its only importance becomes the bond between two people, and how the institution itself exists within society becomes meaningless.

That, in my opinion, is another crumbling pillar in the downfall of Western Civilization.

Back when I was young and unmarried and playing 6 nights a week in the regional nightclub circuit, our band befriended a young couple who would come to see us play every time we were in town. We were all in our early 20s, and they were i their early 30s. They were as nice as one could imagine. Rather hippy-ish, but very nice. When we came to know them better, they shared that they had an open relationship. And she was a very pretty woman. Not knockout pretty, but very cute and slender. She came on to me once, and I refused, basically saying, "You're Bob's wife, no way, I like you, but I like him, and I'm not going there." She responded by reminding me that they had an open marriage, and that it was OK with Bob. I told her, "But it's not OK with me."

Not sure how or why that shred of morality was instilled in me at that point in my life, because I was kind of a male slut in those days. But even though it was being offered on a silver platter with no consequence, somehow I knew the consequence would be within my own spirit and soul, don't go there. It's wrong.

[Glock32]

When will we see an alternate headline like: "How Sleeping Around Saved My Relationship (But Gave Us Both An Incurable Disease)"

[Weisshaupt]

I told her, "But it's not OK with me."

Not sure how or why that shred of morality was instilled in me at that point in my life, because I was kind of a male slut in those days. But even though it was being offered on a silver platter with no consequence, somehow I knew the consequence would be within my own spirit and soul, don't go there. It's wrong.

What, you didn't want to be her sexual chew toy?  I am not sure what I would have done as  younger man in that situation - but it would have set up alarm bells - Its a bad idea!

[Lisa in PA]

There was an episode of Cold Case about this, from the 70's.  The people who were hurt by this type of behavior were the children, so I hope these two never have any.  The teenage daughter had to put up with a bunch of grief from people about what a whore her mother was, and the son of the guy was caught in the middle by making excuses for his dad when the hook-up turned serious and ruined his parent's marriage.  I think there are some people who like to have their lives full of drama and chaos.  I feel sorry for them.

[Alphabet Soup]

Just pray these two never have kids.

Her uterus ain't for birthin' no babies.  Kills all those one night shack-ups.

Yeah, that is why she will make us pay for the 14 abortions she will have over her lifetime, selflessly allowing her babies to merge back with the cosmos.

That's OK though because, you see, life is just one big pachinko game and all those murdered babies just go into the cosmic recycle hopper, ready to pop out next time.

[Glock32]

I told her, "But it's not OK with me."

Not sure how or why that shred of morality was instilled in me at that point in my life, because I was kind of a male slut in those days. But even though it was being offered on a silver platter with no consequence, somehow I knew the consequence would be within my own spirit and soul, don't go there. It's wrong.

What, you didn't want to be her sexual chew toy?  I am not sure what I would have done as  younger man in that situation - but it would have set up alarm bells - Its a bad idea!

Yeah. Seduction by a sultry older woman is a staple of the young man's fantasies. But even in my randiest, most libido-driven days of my early and mid 20s, one line I would never cross was marriage. It wasn't something that really even required any serious thought, because I always knew that when (now beginning to look more like if) I got married I wanted it to mean something, and the meaning derives from the respect we have for the institution. Personally, I view the institution as a spiritual one -- a declaration before God and Man. I can't grasp the idea of treating it like some perfunctory business arrangement with a bunch of clauses and opt-outs.

[IronDioPriest]

Allow me to thread-jack for a moment and retell a hilarious story born of the debauchery of those days...

Our band was playing a weeklong stint in Fargo ND, and in those days, after-bar parties were an every night occurance, and trolling for one-night stands was a part of that lifestyle.

Our sound-man hooked up with a girl/woman and didn't find out until after the deed was done that she was married. We gave him endless crap about it. But the next night's performance was the best practical joke I ever played on anybody.

There was a huge biker-dude who sat at the same place at the bar every night. He was there every time our bar rotation would bring us back around to Fargo, and he was part of that after-bar party scene, so we knew him well enough.

The night after our sound guy's aforementioned dalliance, I offered the biker dude drinks for the night if he'd approach the sound guy and tell him that the husband of the woman he was with the night before was his brother, knew about the one night stand, and was on his way to the bar at that moment to deal with it. I told him to tell the sound man, "If you think I'M big, you should see my brother."

I shared the joke with my bandmates, and after we began playing, we watched the biker rise from his stool and walk over to the sound man, lean down, and speak into his ear, and then walk away. Between songs, the sound man sprinted to the stage, yelling, "I have to get out of here, I have to get out of here! There's a guy on his way here to kill me!"

We laughed our butts off from the stage, and revealed our practical joke to the whole place. The look of terror on his face was so worth it!

I suppose in retrospect, it was a public shaming of sorts, making him the butt of a joke born of his own poor judgment. Perhaps that was another instance of my innate moral sense about marriage rising to the fore, even as I was wallowing in all sorts of my own indiscretions during those days.