Author Topic: Bloomberg Refused 2nd Slice of pizza at Local Restaurant  (Read 1913 times)

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Offline IronDioPriest

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Bloomberg Refused 2nd Slice of pizza at Local Restaurant
« on: May 02, 2013, 05:21:07 PM »
...because it could so easily be true....

Bloomberg Refused Second Slice of Pizza at Local Restaurant

New York Mayor Michael Bloomberg was denied a second slice of pizza today at an Italian eatery in Brooklyn.

The owners of Collegno's Pizzeria say they refused to serve him more than one piece to protest Bloomberg's proposed soda ban,which would limit the portions of soda sold in the city.

Bloomberg was having an informal working lunch with city comptroller John Liu at the time and was enraged by the embarrassing prohibition. The owners would not relent, however, and the pair were forced to decamp to another restaurant to finish their meal.

Witnesses say the situation unfolded when as the two were looking over budget documents, they realized they needed more food than originally ordered.

"Hey, could I get another pepperoni over here?" Bloomberg asked owner Antonio Benito.

"I'm sorry sir," he replied, "we can't do that. You've reached your personal slice limit."

Stop and Tisk
Mayor Bloomberg, not accustomed to being challenged, assumed that the owner was joking.

"OK, that's funny," he remarked, "because of the soda thing ... No come on. I'm not kidding. I haven't eaten all morning, just send over another pepperoni."

"I'm sorry sir. We're serious," Benito insisted. "We've decided that eating more than one piece isn't healthy for you, and so we're forbidding you from doing it."

"Look jackass," Bloomberg retorted, his anger boiling, "I f**king skipped breakfast this morning just so I could eat four slices of your pizza. Don't be a schmuck, just get back to the kitchen and bring out some f**king pizza, okay."

"I'm sorry sir, there's nothing I can do," the owner repeated. "Maybe you could go to several restaurants and get one slice at each. At least that way you're walking. You know, burning calories."

Witnesses say a fuming Bloomberg and a bemused Liu did indeed walk down the street to a rival pizzeria , ordered another slice and finished their meeting.

New York's so-called "soda ban" would have limited the size of sweetened beverages served in restaurants to 16 oz (0.5 liters). The plan, backed by Mayor Bloomberg, is currently being held up by a U.S. district court.

Bloomberg has been the mayor of New York City since 2002. Theretofore he was the CEO of Bloomberg LP, the world's leading financial data firm. His personal fortune is estimated at around $27 billion.


"A strict observance of the written laws is doubtless one of the high duties of a good citizen, but it is not the highest. The laws of necessity, of self-preservation, of saving our country when in danger, are of higher obligation. To lose our country by a scrupulous adherence to written law, would be to lose the law itself, with life, liberty, property and all those who are enjoying them with us; thus absurdly sacrificing the end to the means."

- Thomas Jefferson

Offline ChrstnHsbndFthr

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Re: Bloomberg Refused 2nd Slice of pizza at Local Restaurant
« Reply #1 on: May 02, 2013, 05:32:20 PM »
Gotta love a well-deserved smack-down by a GOOD citizen on a bad politician!
“My mission today is to go forth and tell people about why I follow Christ and also what the Bible teaches, and part of that teaching is that women and men are meant to be together.

“However, I would never treat anyone with disrespect just because they are different from me. We are all created by the Almighty and like Him, I love all of humanity. We would all be better off if we loved God and loved each other.”
Phil Robertson an elder in the church of Christ

Offline Weisshaupt

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Re: Bloomberg Refused 2nd Slice of pizza at Local Restaurant
« Reply #2 on: May 02, 2013, 05:32:38 PM »
Please God, let it be true.

What is wrong  Bloomberg? Is it offensive when someone else tells you how much food you can have? Or only when they do it to you. I sure hope someone caught it on video.

Offline benb61

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Re: Bloomberg Refused 2nd Slice of pizza at Local Restaurant
« Reply #3 on: May 02, 2013, 05:35:54 PM »
I would have loved to have been there.  Is it true, why would you think it not? It's not the Onion.
Eschew Obfuscation

Offline Alphabet Soup

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Re: Bloomberg Refused 2nd Slice of pizza at Local Restaurant
« Reply #4 on: May 02, 2013, 05:51:36 PM »
I would have loved to have been there.  Is it true, why would you think it not? It's not the Onion.

Did you see some of the other "headlines"?

Pope Benedict Comes Out as Gay
Paul Ryan Refuses to Tip Elderly Black Waiter
CNN Reports Barack Obama Has Resigned (please God let this one be true!)
Michele Bachmann Accidentally Embarks on Gay Cruise


Offline IronDioPriest

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Re: Bloomberg Refused 2nd Slice of pizza at Local Restaurant
« Reply #5 on: May 02, 2013, 06:00:54 PM »
I thought my lead-in teaser tagged this as satire. Didn't mean to fool anyone with anything but the headline.
"A strict observance of the written laws is doubtless one of the high duties of a good citizen, but it is not the highest. The laws of necessity, of self-preservation, of saving our country when in danger, are of higher obligation. To lose our country by a scrupulous adherence to written law, would be to lose the law itself, with life, liberty, property and all those who are enjoying them with us; thus absurdly sacrificing the end to the means."

- Thomas Jefferson

Offline benb61

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Re: Bloomberg Refused 2nd Slice of pizza at Local Restaurant
« Reply #6 on: May 02, 2013, 06:02:09 PM »
I would have loved to have been there.  Is it true, why would you think it not? It's not the Onion.

Did you see some of the other "headlines"?

Pope Benedict Comes Out as Gay
Paul Ryan Refuses to Tip Elderly Black Waiter
CNN Reports Barack Obama Has Resigned (please God let this one be true!)
Michele Bachmann Accidentally Embarks on Gay Cruise

No, I didn't see those, the page didn't load properly, I was barely able to read the article.  Oh well...
Eschew Obfuscation

Offline John Florida

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Re: Bloomberg Refused 2nd Slice of pizza at Local Restaurant
« Reply #7 on: May 02, 2013, 06:03:38 PM »
 Damn I was hoping!!
All men are created equal"
 Filippo Mazzie

charlesoakwood

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Re: Bloomberg Refused 2nd Slice of pizza at Local Restaurant
« Reply #8 on: May 02, 2013, 06:33:43 PM »

"I thought my lead-in teaser tagged this as satire. ..."

Well, yeah.  Hey, you expect us to read all the words?
                                                                               ::exitstageleft::

Offline Libertas

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Re: Bloomberg Refused 2nd Slice of pizza at Local Restaurant
« Reply #9 on: May 02, 2013, 07:46:15 PM »
IDP is such a tease!

But it did seem just too good to be true.
We are now where The Founders were when they faced despotism.

Offline Alphabet Soup

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Re: Bloomberg Refused 2nd Slice of pizza at Local Restaurant
« Reply #10 on: May 02, 2013, 09:15:39 PM »
The secret of good satire is its plausibility.

Offline BigAlSouth

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Re: Bloomberg Refused 2nd Slice of pizza at Local Restaurant
« Reply #11 on: May 03, 2013, 05:05:49 AM »
Just do what Democrats do: Take the fake but accurate headline and run with it . . . .
The problems we face today are there because the people who work for a living
are outnumbered by those who vote for a living.
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Offline ToddF

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Re: Bloomberg Refused 2nd Slice of pizza at Local Restaurant
« Reply #12 on: May 03, 2013, 07:32:03 AM »
The Daily Current is satire, more often then not mocking Republicans, which leftist moron think is fact.

They did a "story" about Sarah Palin blaming the Czech Republic for the bombings, which 95% of their readership took as true.

Offline AmericanPatriot

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Re: Bloomberg Refused 2nd Slice of pizza at Local Restaurant
« Reply #13 on: May 04, 2013, 07:43:51 AM »
You got me on that one.
I was ready to pass it on.

This is one of those things that ought to be true even though they're not.
Sort of like how Black Jack Pershing dealt with the Muslim terrorists in the Philippines.

I can only imagine the crap that would go down on any business that did this.
The full weight of the massive bureaucracy would have this guy out of business before the day was over

Offline trapeze

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Re: Bloomberg Refused 2nd Slice of pizza at Local Restaurant
« Reply #14 on: May 04, 2013, 10:27:15 AM »
The thing is, though, that there is a good chance that this will happen* and that it will be recorded on video.

It is a very serious mistake to mess around with anyone involved in serving you food. The smart person waits until after the meal is served before insulting the waiter/waitress/chef. Doing so beforehand invites, no, begs them to do something horrible to the food you are about to consume.

When I was a teenager and worked one summer in a department store I was witness to this:

Customer asks for a product that has to come from warehouse in back of store. Lowly teenage clerk brings out box (something like a clock radio) that has an insignificant dent to one corner. Customer flips out, cusses, personally insults lowly teenage clerk and demands that lowly teenage clerk bring out unblemished item from warehouse. Lowly teenage clerk goes to warehouse, selects pristine box and proceeds to smash it against the floor (all the while maintaining unblemished appearance) until something begins to rattle inside. Lowly teenage clerk returns to customer with severely damaged goods in pristine box, gives it to jackass customer, smiles and begs forgiveness.

*But be patient. NYC restaurant owners aren't stupid, either. They will wait until the jackass is out of office and cannot retaliate against their establishments with NYC health inspectors. Because he would.
« Last Edit: May 04, 2013, 10:39:37 AM by trapeze »
In a doomsday scenario, hippies will be among the first casualties. So not everything about doomsday will be bad.