It's About Liberty: A Conservative Forum
Topics => General Board => Topic started by: Pandora on September 26, 2011, 02:34:58 AM
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Did you hear about the dyslexic existentialist? He spent his entire life pondering the meaning of dog.
A man's home is his castle, in a manor of speaking.
?Dijon vu - the same mustard as before.??
Practice safe eating - always use condiments.??
Shotgun wedding - A case of wife or death.??
A man needs a mistress just to break the monogamy.??
A hangover is the wrath of grapes.??
Dancing cheek-to-cheek is really a form of floor play.??
Does the name Pavlov ring a bell???
Condoms should be used on every conceivable occasion.??
Reading while sunbathing makes you well red.??
When two egotists meet, it's an I for an I.??
A bicycle can't stand on its own because it is two tired.??
What's the definition of a will? (It's a dead give away.)??
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.??
In democracy your vote counts. In feudalism your count votes.??
She was engaged to a boyfriend with a wooden leg but broke it off.??
A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.??
If you don't pay your exorcist, you get repossessed.??
With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress.??
The man who fell into an upholstery machine is fully recovered.??
You feel stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.??
Local Area Network in Australia - the LAN down under.??
Every calendar's days are numbered.??
A lot of money is tainted - It taint yours and it taint mine.??
A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat.??
He had a photographic memory that was never developed.??
A midget fortune-teller who escapes from prison is a small medium at large.??
Once you've seen one shopping center, you've seen a mall.??
Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead-to-know basis.??
Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses.
?Acupuncture is a jab well done.
Swiped from Mike M. (http://confederateyankee.mu.nu/archives/321804.php)
One I heard a few times as a much younger lady: "If I told you you had a nice body, would you hold it against me?"
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"If I told you you had a nice body, would you hold it against me?"
Yeah, that pickup line doesn't work so much, not anymore anyway...
;D