Well, serenity prayer I know...but I don't believe in not being able to change anything...sure there is scale to consider but I believe I have all choices open...and all benefits and consequences along with them...and not putting the bottle down if I want it...but I will say beyond a shadow of a doubt that getting out of the rat race (city job, city home, city jackasses) and bugging out to the lake will instantly improve my mood...and I am at the point where I want to make short cuts and make it happen faster...and if I am hampered out the gate, so be it...don't care, I'll figure something out...my patience is melting like ice in a frying pan.
I now pick up a bottle less often -- and really that is a start. ( My ability to be productive sharply declines with a bottle around. So no judgement implied , just a statement of fact)
I didn't say nothing could be changed, but you need the wisdom to know what can be - that is the point of the prayer - some things can't be changed, and its a certain that even if they could be, fretting and complaining will not be the methods by which that occurs.
Consider taking those short-cuts now. Consider cashing out retirement accounts and selling any assets ( the money I got this year was from selling a very sentimental piece of land where I camped as a child and that my parents gifted to me on our wedding day ) - they won't survive the economic collapse anyway, and if you are likely dying in a hail of bullets in 10 years what good does retirement money do you? And prices seem to be only going up.. Its hard to predict the future ( my new solar system is half the cost of the one at the Mountain home) but this isn't about accumulating money - but accumulating self-worth, competency and self-sufficiency.
Of course you must then accept that there will be no "retirement" for you and you may have to live and help out with children or relatives in old age ( which I firmly believe will keep you active and living a meaningful life.. this idea of "independent living' as one ages isn't a great one in my opinion.I have no problem wandering off from camp at some point when I have become too burdensome..)
Of course, unable to afford homes, maybe those children and relatives are living with you in what you built with the "retirement funds". Once you have the baseline finances sorted, then find that job that fits the situation, again accepting that fancy resort vacations, the prestige of a white collar job, and other luxuries may not be on the table ( as they weren't for nearly every person in every generation before you, and probably only existed recently because of the shameless borrowing against our own children and grandchildren) ) Stop trying to get your family to participate - if your extra efforts are what save them in the end , so what? Better to be generous with something you have than to lack it and be the one begging. If your siblings bitch you are living at the lake house and should pay for the privilege , just point to the money, time and effort you are putting into improvements .
I had another friend, older than I , who quit his high paying sales management position and took a job with the State of Wyoming doing... tech support, just about the time I was thinking of getting the bugout place.. . He outright bought a smallish suburban home in not the best neighborhood of Cheyenne (crime is low there regardless) and took a $100K cut in income. He worked at the state long enough to get a small retirement -and has Social Security, and a pension from way back in the Bell Telephone days. With no mortgage he does just fine - he gets about 30-40K a year - and has money left over to buy guns and support his hobbies - which mostly consist of hunting, reloading and shooting. ( He is literally hunting at least 1/3 of the days in a year, and shoots 3-4 times a week at an awesome local outdoor range) ) Even with the inflated powder and ammo prices he is still able to do this.. His food bills are not all that high either, and he is out and about all of the time and is basically an honorary grandparent to my kids and those of another mutual friend (ex military) . He is part of my clan, and I part of his. He confided to me he wished he had gotten out sooner than he did. Money does not equal quality of life.
I have another friend ( also a clan member) who feels handcuffed to his job by the regualr stock options-- but has his bugout in South Dakota. COVID finally let him go there and get some work done - he finally installed the Solar System we bought at the same time when I did the mountain house..and he too remarked at the simple joy of just getting things done that put time into himself and his own life. I wish he would just take those next steps ( he is single, earns $150K + a year , and has been stacking PMs for a decade now.. He financed his building loan on his bugout by putting silver up as collateral) Money does not equal quality of life. He hates his job. He hates being in the burbs. He wants to be in SD close to his mom and family. But he still has too much pride and ego investment as I once did.
At this point even if the disaster I am prepping for never materializes, the new way of life that prepping pushed me into is far superior to the vacuous, less meaningful one I lived in the burbs.
Some will look and say "all of that money wasted" or "He used to be somebody and look how he has fallen" and from one perspective that will be correct. It was scary making those decisions, but now with hindsight it was some of the best money I have ever spent. Do it. Make the changes and invite that chaos into your life, and and trust that God will use the chaos to push you where you need to be.
